Sunday, August 22, 2004
...JiNxEd...
I really think today's jinxed. First, I have incomplete notes in Biochem. Tomorrow's the exam. Second, I don't have my English notebook with me. Third, I lost the small ruler Sir Samson gave me. Well, it's not really a ruler but it was the piece of cardboard he used to teach me how to make a perpendicular line. *sigh*
But it's the ruler that's really upsetting me. It meant a lot to me. It was not just a tool for making perpendicular lines--it was a remembrance from our old teacher Sir Samsy which I intended to keep til I grow old and I would only return it on his funeral when the time comes. *sigh*
Sir Samson didn't just teach me Math itself--he taught me how to love it. He was the first teacher to say I was good in Math and I will remember him for the rest of my life. Now the ruler's lost. Console me, please.
...tOo MuCh oF sOmEtHiNg iS bAd EnOuGh...
Sometimes I think people are taking advantage of my being too kind.
It has happened a tad too many times already. And it has to stop.
I don't know why I still remain calm and forgiving to those people who take advantage of my willingness to help them.
I lent Nicolai my English notebook last Thursday. I wasn't supposed to, but he promised he'd give it back as soon as he had it xeroxed. Because I understood him, I told him to just put it inside my bag that afternoon since we would be too busy practicing for the choric speech contest.
Guess what? He never gave it back. How the hell will I review for our English test tomorrow?
I've been too kind yet it hasn't done me any good. This has to stop. I always end up getting aggravated.
NO MORE MISS NICE CHICK.
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Saturday, August 21, 2004
...SaViNg My SaNiTy...
My dad and I had a talk earlier about psychological disorders. Look like we've got quite a few relatives who have disorders. lol. We have manic-depressives, aerophobics, and obsessive-compulsives (I am one!).
My dad said I better relax and not take life too seriously coz I might snap. Am I freaking you out? lol. Naw, don't be afraid. I'm just OC. No schizophrenia. lol.
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Friday, August 20, 2004
...PaRtY gUrL...
After all the killer late night practices for the Sabayang Pagbigkas contest, it's finally over. Guess what, we sucked BIG TIME. lol. Our performance in the practices was even better! And there was even a part when I was the only one who did the right action--and it even made me look like the wrong one! lol. To make things worse, we got the last place. lol.
Anyway, I think I forgot to mention that it was Jill's birthday yesterday and Joanna's last Monday. We had an exclusive party at Star Plaza, and guess what the theme of the party was? VIDEOKE. yeah baby! =) It was actually a good idea since I believe I needed more bonding time with my friends. We've been busy and all, you know. That's why when they told me about the party, I immediately said yes.
Damn, it was great! Yani and Jose are the best comedians in the world. They even dedicated a song for me. BOOBA. They also dedicated Can't Lose You for Cony (who looks like Vanness Wu of F4)! lol. It was the best! Yani even danced on the table. Kryzl came a bit late and she kept teasing me about my friend whom the punk's courting and the punk since I was sitting beside them. lol. Hello, I am like, sooo over him! lol.
I just had one of the best times of my life!
SLGP peeps, if ever you're reading this, I just want you to know that YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST! I LOVE YAH!! =D I'm glad I had the chance to bond with you again after quite some time. lol. *mwah!*
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
...OnE sWeEt DaY...
I got a very sweet hug from such a special boy this morning right before Economics. It was a quick moment, but those were five of the best seconds in my life. =)
No, it's not my punk or someone else you might have in mind. It was Mrs. Sim's five-year-old son, Gian.
It all started when Maricris, Loraine, and I were hanging out outside the White House. We were talking about the choric speech contest this Friday when Mrs. Sim and her little boy arrived an headed toward the Pascal room. Because I thought we would start the class at once, I rushed to the mini-theater where Kryzl and the rest of the Newton people were brainstorming for our piece without even looking back at Mrs. Sim and Gian.
When we got downstairs, Mrs. Sim called me to the faculty room. She then showed me her little boy who wanted to meet me, the girl who ran away when she saw them coming. lol. Ma'am Beng said the little boy wanted a hug so I gave him one. ;) He was soooo cute! I told him I had a sister his age who looked very much like me. lol.
Anyways, that's my story for today. That sweet little hug surely brightened my day. =)
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
...cHaRmEd OnE...
It's actually funny how I've resorted to whatever way I can get my punk dilemma out of my head. I decided to pull a prank today and it worked! ;)
I made up a second name for Alkaide. Alkaide Lawrence. lol. Yeah right! It was so funny because I kept calling him Lawrence for the whole day and people were asking why. I told them it was his secret second name in his birth certificate and everybody believed me. Okay, so Joanna and Kryzl didn't. But they did believe me at first! ;)
What I found really funny was when I convinced a few of our teachers to change add Alkaide's second name in their class records. lol. They almost did, but Joanna talked them out of it. But still, they believed Alkaide had a second name. They were even telling him how crazy he was not letting the school know because he will have problems with his records in the future. lol.
Charming, naughty little lady. ;)
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Saturday, August 14, 2004
...wAtErBaBy...
This explains why I love the beach / pool.
You're Element is Water. You are soft and serene at
most times but like Wind, you're scary when
you're mad. You proabaly have a talent is
singing and even your speaking voice is lovely.
You have an innocent type of beauty that makes
you look younger than you are and you like
close relationships with people.
What's Your Element(girls)? (PICTURES)
brought to you by Quizilla
Wednesday, August 11, 2004
...yOu LoVe mE, yOu LoVe mE nOt...
What attracts people to you?
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Monday, August 09, 2004
...mY fAvOriTe SiN...
Let's face it, we're all stuck up in this flashy little world where looks seem like the only things that matter. We're all insecure about the way we look and there's no doubt about it. And to combat all these insecurities, we take comfort in parlors, derma clinics, spas, and gyms. In this world, vanity is a necessity and it always was.
I just came from the clinic, btw. If you guys don't know, my mom's a dermatologist. You may think it's more of an advantage for me because I get free facials and whatever treatments I need. Well, you're actually right in thinking that but there is one BIG disadvantage... I always have to maintain a zit-free face and flawless skin.
My mom always gets mad at me whenever she sees zits on my face. Well, it is very normal because I am a teenager but yeah, she has a reputation to live up to. But she wouldn't believe me that it's all just hormonal and also just because of the Vitamin B-complex I take everyday.
I'm also allergic to heat and sweat. I develop rashes easily. When that happens, my skin itches like crazy and I get red all over. She gets mad at me again thinking I've applied the weaker cream again. *sigh*
Anyway, let's get back to vanity. Almost everyone is into making themselves prettier or more handsome. And a lot of these people go overboard. They tend to obsess on their outer appearance and become more self-centered.
Okay... So I do get too upset over my flaws too... If you wanna know, just read on, okay? lol.
Here is a list of my physical insecurities:
* I am SHORT. For those who do not know, I'm only 5'3. Exactly.
* I have big hips. It runs in the fam, no doubt about it. They add unnecessary bulk too. Oh, and it would've been okay if I had a big bum. UNFORTUNATELY... *sigh*
* I am hairy. lol. I dunno, but some girls don't like hairy girls. I dunno why. I also dunno if guys dig hairy girls. lol.
* I have big ears. Minnie Mouse. PERIOD.
However, there are more strengths deep inside me and I'm proud of them too!
* I'm a fighter. I used to be just a crybaby, but past experiences have taught me to be stronger. Now I can laugh in the face of danger. lol. Not that literally though. lol.
* I pray every night. Not all teenage girls or boys have a tight relationship with God, and perhaps that's why they go astray. I may not be the most straight teen in the world but I'm still proud to say I always find a friend in Him whenever I call.
* I'M REAL. What you get is what you see. lol. I consider myself as one of the most transparent people ever. The world needs more transparent people, btw. =)
* I'm never afraid to lose poise. Yeah, whatever. I may not be able to get rid of my beauty queen stance but I always enjoy doing the dirty work. Guy things? No such thing. I'm gonna be a cowgirl, baby! lol.
* I don't regret things. There are no mistakes, only lessons to be learned. I don't like regretting. You can't change it anyway, right? Might as well get up and try again.
* I am really determined to reach for my dreams. No doubt about it. I will try and try until I succeed. With God, all things are possible. And I know that he's with me throughout my journey.
So think again. Maybe it's not your face or your body you should improve on. Maybe you have to pay more attention to your inner self. Besides, outer beauty is temporary--it will fade through time. Inner beauty? It'll keep you aglow within for the rest of your life. =)
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Sunday, August 08, 2004
...AfTeR tHe RaiN...
Val's right. Waiting for the results to come to you is the hardest part of the entire UPCAT frenzy.
I'm wondering how it would actually feel if I didn't pass and almost all the other Top Ten studes did. Ouch! I guess that would be like hitting my head on our giant sturdy ref. lol. It would definitely pierce my heart to death. *gulp*
Then again, why am I becoming a negative thinker again? Is it because I oftentimes get what I want when I think negatively? And that there is a secret fountain of hope deep inside me?
Anyway, I finally got to make up for the few hours of sleep I sacrificed in preparation for the UPCAT. I napped for three hours this afternoon. It felt soooo good, dude!
Btw, my niece in the States did a test shoot for the August cover of American Baby. I wish her all the best. Hah! I guess the modeling thing runs in the blood huh?! lol. I hope I can have my own cover too someday. Too bad this blog isn't named Cover Gurl anymore. lol.
Well, I have another entrance exam coming up this September. It's for the Ateneo. My dad graduated there. I hope I can get in. ADMU's my only hope if ever I don't get into UP. So please pray for me.
Btw, Raph joined TeenTalk already. I can't believe he did. And he's actually enjoying it. Advantage, I have a guy friend who'll defend me if ever some teentalker disses me or something. Disadvantage, he'll be reading some posts about my bitter lovelife. lol.
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Saturday, August 07, 2004
...pOsT-UpCaT sYnDrOmE...
The UPCAT killed me. lol. Yani and I raced to the comfort room as soon as we finished. I was luckier, though. I barfed in the only cubicle that had a functional flush. lol. I had to fetch her a pail of water. Okay, let's not go into any more details. I may be grossing you out. lol.
It wasn't that hard, actually. The Language Proficiency was the best. I was joking myself as I answered the Language part, "Yeah right. Intarmed, here I come!" But as I went through the Science part, I was like, "Err..Did we even take this up?" The Math part was okay. I'm so proud of myself for overcoming my fear of numbers. I did quite well. Only, I missed three questions. The Reading Comprehension was the silent killer. It was hell easy, but it was hell long too. That was the most nauseating part I've ever gotten through.
Well, I'm glad it's over. And I'm glad I didn't give in to my body's pleads of not finishing the exam. The UPCAT's done. All I have to do is to wait for the results. I hope all the painstaking sacrifice pays off. ;)
By the way, I'd like to thank all of you people who've prayed for me. You know who you are. And I love you for that! ;)
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Friday, August 06, 2004
...pRe-UpCaT sYnDrOmE...
I feel such sorrow today. Nothing's going right, really. I'm very nervous about the UPCAT. My brain isn't absorbing anything anymore. I thought relaxing would help, but only a few minutes after I fell asleep, one of our helpers knocked loudly on my bedroom door. Dang, they delivered my new bed. And I never got some sleep after that.
Gabriel's partymates are practicing here for their Grand Rally next week. I have no idea where to stay since I need a really quiet place to study. The slightest noise irritates me. My room's the nearest to the Great Room, and that's where all the noise will be coming from.
Also, I've been reprimanded for the nth time today. *sigh* Can't they just reprimand me after the UPCAT? They can rant about my lifestyle all they want once the UPCAT's done. But as of now, all I need is encouragement. I can't believe my mom and I even argued about a watch! lol. I insisted on bringing a digital watch since it would be better but she wanted me to wear my old school Kenneth Cole watch. My dad got mad at me for sticking a whole manila paper of physics formulas on the wall facing my bed because the tape would gather dirt. *sigh*
Also, I just found out that the Correct Minus Wrong factor of the UPCAT was reduced to 1/4, from the former 1/5. Darn. That means I have to work extra hard, huh? And I can't even review because of my nervousness! I don't know if I should feel intimidated or challenged. Though I feel both, I'm more of intimidated, and I feel like I've lost my fighting spirit.
It's going to be a long journey tomorrow. Tomorrow will either make or break my future. You can help me big time by praying for me. Please do that. I will someday return the favor. ;)
*gulp*
UPCAT, here I come!
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Thursday, August 05, 2004
...EvErYtHiNg'S OkAy...
The first thing my classmates told me as I went into the White House was that I got zero in the Physics quiz yesterday. Actually, I didn't go to school yesterday because I had a headache and I decided to make good use of the time and study for the UPCAT. Unfortunately, Sir Samson did not consider my letter and gave me a zero.
I cried throughout the flag ceremony to the first ten minutes of Biochem. I can't believe Alkaide stayed with me at the back. He said nothing to comfort me, but he made me feel that he was just there if ever I need him. I love my bessy. ;)
It's so amazing how I got 9/10 in our hardy-hard-hard quiz after the discussion in Biochem since I wasn't really listening. Ms. Catalan kept asking me some questions that I failed to answer. Again, I was embarrassed in front of the class. Poor Ms. Aiming-for-Valedictorian. lol. But yeah, I got 9 in her quiz.
The panel discussion in English was really fun. Our group's topic was about premarital sex. lol. I can't believe how open we seniors actually are. It's great though, since the openness was really fun. lol. We've all grown past our naivete in our first few years in high school. I will really miss my batchmates.
I'm also very happy since I got to finish our art project. Yay! I haven't worked on it for two days and tomorrow is the deadline. I finished it today. Hah! Ze power ov ze creative mind! lol.
Okay, so let's go to Sir Samson again. Just when I thought my valedictorian dreams would go out of my reach, he told me that he would not record that quiz. *sigh* He also told me, Natakot ka ano, Siska? (You were scared huh, Siska?) I can't believe he did that! I didn't mind the way he called me, I was just so happy he became considerate enough! =)
Also, I convinced our dear principal to allow the seniors who will be taking the UPCAT to take the rest of the afternoon off. I complimented him about his nice haircut and then I went straight to my point. *gasp* I CONVINCED HIM.
I can't believe how sweet talk can actually go a long way. I'm never washing the sugar off my tongue then! ;)
So yeah, I'm happy. Damn happy. I went home hurriedly and brought Plato Wraps for my sibs. They were joyful seeing me. Happiness is contagious, there's no doubt about it. =)
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Wednesday, August 04, 2004
...tHe PiAnO...
I hope this story inspires you the way it did me. It encouraged me to study harder for the UPCAT and to continue with my life as if there are no haters out there. lol.
The Piano
Wishing to encourage her young son's progress on the piano, a mother took her boy to a Paderewski concert.
After they were seated the mother spotted a friend in the audience and walked down the aisle to greet her. Seizing the opportunity to explore the wonders of the concert hall, the little boy rose and eventurally explored his way through a door marked "NO ADMITTANCE".
When the house lights dimmed and the concert was about to begin, the mother returned to her seat and discovered that the child was missing. Suddenly, the curtains parted and spotlights focused on the impressive Steinway on stage.
In horror, the mother saw her little boy sitting at the keyboard, innocently picking out "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star."
At that moment, the great piano master made his entrance, quickly moved to the piano, and whispered to the boy's ear, 'Don't quit. Keep playing.'
Then leaning over, Paderewski reached down his left hand and began filling in a bass part. Soon, his right arm reached around the other side of the child and he added a running obligato.
Together, the old master and the young novice transformed a frightening situation into a wonderfully creative experience. The audience was mesmerized.
****
That's the way it is with God. What we can accomplish on our own is hardly noteworthy. We try our best, but the results aren't exactly graceful flowing music. But with the hand of the Master, our life's work truly can be beautiful.
Next time you set out to accomplish great feats, listen carefully. You can hear the voice of the Master whispering in your ear, "Don't quit. Keep playing." Feel his loving arms around you. Know that His strong hands are there helping your turn your feeble attempts into true masterpieces.
Remember, God doesn't call the equipped, He equips the called. And He'll always be there to love and guide you on the great things.
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Tuesday, August 03, 2004
...mAjOr BrAiN OvErLoAd...
I finally got my test permit for the UPCAT. *gasp* I'll be taking it on Saturday. I wanted so badly to get the Sunday sked, but I guess that was His plan for me. Nevermind if August 8 would have had two eights which, in Chinese, were indeed lucky. I'm content anyway with the fact that I won't be in the 6:30 AM batch. I'll be taking the test at 12:30 with Yani, Alvin, Krish, Helena, and Angel.
So yeah, I'm excited...errr...not really...nervous actually. UP is really my dream school. I'm only taking UST, UP, and ADMU entrance exams. If I don't pass any of them, my parents won't pay for my college education.
I know, I'm overreacting. It's just that I'm really worried about the test. I really want to pass. I know I haven't been doing my best in reviewing that's why I'm trying to catch up. It'll hurt my fragile little ego if all of my other batchmates pass the UPCAT and I don't. My choice of courses wouldn't matter to what the people would think of me. They wouldn't consider the fact that I chose Diliman and Manila campuses and all my options were quota courses. Poor me. Imagine all the frustrated sighs of those who have expected a lot from me.
I am really pressured. People keep telling me I can make it coz I'm number one in our batch. But I tell you, it's not that easy. It pressures me even more because I don't want to be left out by my batchmates who'll pass. Dang quota courses. Do I need to regret my choices? I mean, it is sooo hard to get in! And I'm not even sure if I'll love medicine 'til the end! *sigh*
Anyway, I'll need your prayers--LOTS OF THEM.
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Monday, August 02, 2004
...wHeN nAuGhTy gUrLs bEcOmE gOoD...
I am so happy I was able to do something good today! I ate a Raging Chicken Burger Value Meal at McDonald's and I was able to put P11 inside the coinbox for charity. Yay! I was only supposed to buy fries but when I saw the coinbox, I started computing for value meals that would both fill my stomach and would yield more change.
I hope I serve as an inspiration to all of you. I strongly encourage you guys to drop coins in whatever charity coinbox you see. A few loose change may seem worthless to us but if at least fifty people dropped theirs in those boxes, at least two to four children could be benefitted.
You, dear reader, are indeed very lucky since you have access to a computer, which costs quite enough to support a kid in a charitable institution for the following five years. lol.
I've actually been cost-cutting for the past few months. I don't buy credits when I don't need them. I'd rather live peacefully than hearing my celly beep once in a while. (But I'd be a hypocrite if I told you I don't really need a cellphone! lol.) I've become less impulsive when I shop because I know that not every girl my age is privileged enough. My money could go to more useful things. I hope you will, too. You don't have to have to feel guilty all the time. I just want you to think if your spendings are worth it or not. =)
Just a few loose change and sincere intentions. That's all I'm asking for.
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
...mOnA LiSa sMiLe...
The first time I was ever amazed at and strongly influenced by a teacher's points was on Ms. Chi Chi's first lecture in junior year. The only time it happened again was on Ms. Beng Sim's first lecture in senior year. They are the only teachers ever to make my jaw drop.
Ms. Beng, I swear, is more than an Economics teacher. She is an angel. I swear by it. No one will ever motivate our class to have confidence in ourselves than she can. She would always tell us of her a la Princess Diaries transformation from a high school geek into a woman of strong will. I, too, have been growing a lot with every life story she has shared. She is one of the very few teachers who can make me voluntarily shut my mouth and listen for the whole period.
Just this morning, she shared with us a story of an eagle that died thinking it was just a chicken. She told us, if only that creature that the initiative to fly and soar high, and didn't mind what the other chicken said, she would've lived her dream. And that's what Ms. Beng wanted us to do.
People will always try to bring you down--you can never change that. These people are usually those who once thought you were just ordinary but have soon witnessed you rising up. Others will want to make you feel bad about yourself because they are insecure of you themselves. But you must always remember that "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."
I wrote this entry hoping to inspire you all--especially those readers who are afraid of spreading their wings. Whoever you are, remember that it would never hurt to try. Don't be just a dreamer. ACT. NOW. Don't keep thinking you're just a chicken. ;)
MoOd DoLL sAyS:
Sunday, August 01, 2004
...aBoUt tHe UpCaT aNd sWeEt nOtHiNgS...
Raph did great with the layout. I really love it! =) I can't imagine how this blog would look if i did the HTML myself. Ick. But i'm proud to say that I embeded the chobits music myself. =)
Newaiz, I decided to take a break from all that studying. Dealing with Math for two straight hours caused my brain system to crash. lol. It's already next week and I believe I still have a lot of catching up to do. My mom's constant and annoying reminders of studying for the UPCAT have seeped into my consciousness only now. Why only now? I've wasted too much time doing nothing last summer! She was sooo right. Now I regret not prioritizing my review. All I can do right now is to cram. (That's what I'm good at, btw! lol.)
But I actually made something good out of myself last summer. I don't know how, but I just gradually transformed into my complete opposite for the past four months. I've been unusually quiet and more at peace with the world. I only talk when I have something important to say. I don't speak when it's not necessary.
I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing, but I've noticed that I've lost my kikay-ness. I could just leave the house without anything, not even lipbalm, on my face and I wouldn't feel incomplete. I would only comb my hair after taking a bath, and that would be it. I wouldn't care. lol. I barely use my lipglosses and even my once-super-duper-loved lip and cheek tint. But mind you, I still haven't lost my fashion sense. lol. But really, I'm turning into a simple girl...and I'm actually comfortable with being simple.
I used to think being a simple girl would make me a boring person. I wanted to be different in our school so I acted kikay and loud. But over the summer, I discovered more about myself. Yes, I still am gifted with a creative and nonconformist style, but I learned to fuss less about my looks and more on my worth as a person. I've grown less fonder of vanity. I've learned to actually become down-to-earth. I've learned to care less on the outside and more on the inside....and it feels just right.
I've matured now, I just know it. I know it'll take some time for some people to understand why I've changed--well, it'll take me a while to understand these changes too--but I'm sure that when they do, I'll be known as a better person. It's a good change, I can feel it. I'm getting closer to being a woman in my current Not-A-Girl-Not-Yet-A-Woman stage. I've learned to conquer my fears, especially that of Math. =) I've learned to be more tolerant of others, and, in connection with that, I've learned to control myself. No more impulsive let-out-of-my-mouths. I've learned the importance of being a doer and not just a dreamer. You will never be able to reach your goals if you cannot break through your inhibitions. And when you're done, you'll be able to say, "I came, I saw, I conquered."
But there are some things that will never change about me. I will always be light even if I now think and speak with more depth. I will always be a hopeless romantic even if I now think less of my love life. I will always be smiling even if I've shed the annoyingly perky facade. I will always be sensitive even if I know now how to hold back my tears. And remember...
I will always be a dreamer...
...Of FaiRiEs aNd pErsOnaLiTy qUiZzEs....
Okay. I'm just taking a break from reviewing for the UPCAT. My head is this close to exploding, dude. That's why I took a break. Whatever. lol.
You are like the light fairy. She beleives only in
comfort and happiness. She ahs the power to
make people happy and comfortable in the
darkest of times. She loves all beings equally,
but when she is not needed, she can also be
annoying, she follows people, and is too much
of a goody goody, and can drive people
nuts!!!!!!!! That is all the major things about
the Light fairy. can you relate to some of
them? You probably can, because that is what
this quiz is for!
**The ultimate Fairy quiz**(anime pics!) for girls, but if you are a guy you can take it too! !**being improved more**!
brought to you by Quizilla
And here's another one, ladies and gents. This is really true, guys, although I've been unusually quiet and calm for the past few months. lol.
your weapon is your own mouth and quick thinking,
you can convince anyone to do whatever you want
by asking them with sound effects, facial
expressions, and even humor, you are in control
and are great at sorting out
What is your weapon? with anime pics !
brought to you by Quizilla
