Thursday, March 31, 2005
...LaSt HuRrAh...
My love, it's been a long time since I cried and left you out of the blue...
It's actually been a while since we last talked. We saw each other this morning and I asked you about some thing very casually. It seemed as if we no longer had a trace of yesterday.
It's hard leaving you the way when I never really wanted to...
Hah, yeah. I know. Maybe it was I who stepped out first. And since that day, things were never the same. The formerly bright and warm something we shared turned cold like the tears I've shed.
Self denial is a game so strange I never really should've wanted til there was you...
Then again, I go back to the days when that something was new. I never really expected to get to like you or something. It kind of just happened. Those were one of the sweetest days of my life. I could not forget your birthday when I saw you wearing that pink shirt. The night before that, liking you just hit my head like it just fell from heaven. And remember those IRC times when we used to play Blues Clues about whom we were crazy for? Yes, those were the days.
Cause I have learned that love was beyond what human can imagine, more it clears, the more I gotta let you go...
Then again it just had to end with and your passive confusion. It hurt so much when I found out. Then came that rumor that gave the final blow. Whether or not it was true, I guess I have heard too much.
Cause what I don't understand is why I'm feeling so bad now when I know it was my idea...
I know, I know. The time I stepped out was the time I was really confused. You weren't making much effort anyway. I had just been so hurt with the things I heard whether they were true or not. I was hearing too much. I figured stepping out would be the easiest way. BUT NO, IT WASN'T. You can't runaway from your problems. You have to face them, take the risk by believing what you believe is right. FIGHT FOR IT.
But would you ever fight for me? I doubt if you would. Maybe it's better this way...
I could've just denied the truth and lied now why am I the only one standing stranded on the same ground?
...Or maybe not? I just miss you. I miss that boyish laugh, that kulit smile, those moments you made me feel so special, the acronyms and terms we used to make (IS, AV, RP, BC, Bobo Day, PH, etc.), the jokes that annoy me, the long talks, the late night conversations, CRAZY FOR YOU, and so much more.
Tell me, have you stepped out too?
Or is it too late?
