Thursday, March 31, 2005
...LaSt HuRrAh...
My love, it's been a long time since I cried and left you out of the blue...
It's actually been a while since we last talked. We saw each other this morning and I asked you about some thing very casually. It seemed as if we no longer had a trace of yesterday.
It's hard leaving you the way when I never really wanted to...
Hah, yeah. I know. Maybe it was I who stepped out first. And since that day, things were never the same. The formerly bright and warm something we shared turned cold like the tears I've shed.
Self denial is a game so strange I never really should've wanted til there was you...
Then again, I go back to the days when that something was new. I never really expected to get to like you or something. It kind of just happened. Those were one of the sweetest days of my life. I could not forget your birthday when I saw you wearing that pink shirt. The night before that, liking you just hit my head like it just fell from heaven. And remember those IRC times when we used to play Blues Clues about whom we were crazy for? Yes, those were the days.
Cause I have learned that love was beyond what human can imagine, more it clears, the more I gotta let you go...
Then again it just had to end with and your passive confusion. It hurt so much when I found out. Then came that rumor that gave the final blow. Whether or not it was true, I guess I have heard too much.
Cause what I don't understand is why I'm feeling so bad now when I know it was my idea...
I know, I know. The time I stepped out was the time I was really confused. You weren't making much effort anyway. I had just been so hurt with the things I heard whether they were true or not. I was hearing too much. I figured stepping out would be the easiest way. BUT NO, IT WASN'T. You can't runaway from your problems. You have to face them, take the risk by believing what you believe is right. FIGHT FOR IT.
But would you ever fight for me? I doubt if you would. Maybe it's better this way...
I could've just denied the truth and lied now why am I the only one standing stranded on the same ground?
...Or maybe not? I just miss you. I miss that boyish laugh, that kulit smile, those moments you made me feel so special, the acronyms and terms we used to make (IS, AV, RP, BC, Bobo Day, PH, etc.), the jokes that annoy me, the long talks, the late night conversations, CRAZY FOR YOU, and so much more.
Tell me, have you stepped out too?
Or is it too late?
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
...bLiSsFuL*
Today was Girlie's preschool graduation. She did not graduate as Most Outstanding Student, but she got the Word-Smart award. (My dad asked her if it was the award for the most talkative one in class. She grinned evilly.)
She was so energetic the entire program. Whenever Alv, our official videoman, focused her, she made funny faces. LOL. During the singing of the graduation song, she was the liveliest one. My sister stood out effortlessly. And I looove her for that! :D
*Saint Sinner. Even Ald could look holy. ;) (Ald's baccalaureate mass.)
*Afterparty @ Kicaco.
*Girlie and Mom, my paternal grandmother.
*Momskie and Ald.
*Gabe and Popskie.
*Chezki and Girlie.
Grad practice this morning was fun. Actually there was no practice but we spent the whole morning chitchatting with batchmates. Yay. And nay. I'll miss them. :(
By the way, Jenn, my friend from TeenTalk made this mini-collage of us. Cute, huh? Looks like we're wearing the same top! ;)
A day spent with great friends and family. That is what BLISS is all about. ;)
Saturday, March 26, 2005
...yOu-NeSs...
My mom was laughing at me for wearing socks with my slippers as she saw me the moment she arrived. I explained immediately that I was under treatment (I'm treating some calloused areas of my feet and that I have gunk and tape under) and that wearing socks would be really helpful.
I was in a tank top, quasi-boxer shorts, socks, and my chunky hot pink slippers. You look soooo YOU. (In English, it means "You look sooo WEIRD.")
Yay, thank you, Ma. Happy Birthday and congratulations for raising a you daughter. LOL.
After that she took a picture of me with the outfit. Oh yes, she's enjoying.
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It seems that I'm not alone. My dad has got the weirdest memory of lyrics.
Ma: I wanna sing Bed Of Roses (by Bon Jovi; they're in front of the TV using the videoke mic).
Pa: Bed of roses, bed of rooooosesss... (to the tune of PAPER ROSES!)
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My six-year-old sister Girlie thinks the Friendster bulletin board is her blog. She posts just about everything that happens in her life. Would you believe she's even blogging about preschool graduation!
Date: Monday, March 21, 2005 1:46:00 PM
Subject: inis at saya ren ito ha tapos sad ito
Message:
inis next next tuesday na ang graduation tapos
bukas sa astrodom kami nakakainis water at towel
lang ang idadala namin tapos malas pa walang
pagkain tapos sana yung manga canteen sa
school tapos ang cap namin pang lalake pero
babae naman ako e tapos dalawang babae ang
mapapagod ako at si ________________ kaya
hindi ko sinabi yung pangalan nang isa kasi hindi
nyo makikilala tapos buti si kuya gabo ano hindi
mapapagod kasi grade one sya sayang wish ko
nuumber one si kuya gabo para bilib na ako
sakanya na matalino hehe para masgumaling ren
sa kumon at wish ko ren hindi na magulo sa
newton kasi magulo pati si kuya ald pero ako wala
nang newton masaya may bawas na ang
binabarayan nang mama at papa.tapos si margot
kawawa sinipa uwa yan na nga ang mangnyanyari
e.at happy vications friends
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Margot got a weird testi from Adam, one of my Laoag buddies:
From: Clarence (Thursday, March 24, 2005)
Testimonial:
ang swerte namn ng asong toh! my
mganda n at mabait na mommy meron
pang cute na daddy hehe!! margot wag
kang magbabago ahh stay pretty and
stay smart like ur mommy lol!! kain ka
mabuti ahh wag papapayat d maganda
yun d mo mapagtatanggol c mommy
mo !! hahahaha ingatz!!
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My family just doesn't get any weirder/you-er.
I'll miss the you-ness when I go off to college. :(
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
...bReAkFaSt aT TiFfAnY's...
I just saw Breakfast at Tiffany's. It was lovely, darling. Frankly, it was an eye-opener.
I saw this movie like, 6 years ago and I easily got bored. But this time, with the Audrey Hepburn idolism and all, it was splendid.
Holly Golightly and I are sooo the same, except for the smoking though. Two free spirits, afraid to fall in love; fearing that we may be caged and that we may not be able to do what we want with our lives once we're chained. Then again, love can be so magical no one could ever escape it. ;)
"You know what's wrong with you, Miss Whoever-You-Are? You're chicken. You're afraid to stick out your chin and say, 'Okay, life's a fact.' People DO fall in love. People do belong to each other. Because that's the only chance anybody's got for real happiness. You call yourself a free spirit, a wild thing, yet you're terrified that somebody's gonna put you in a cage. Well, baby, you're already in a cage and you built it yourself. And it's not bound on the east by Somali Land or on the west by Tulip, Texas. It's everywhere you go. Because no matter where you run, you're always going to end up running into yourself."
"That's right. I'm crazy about Tiffany's."
"I thought he was just a rat, but he was a superrat all along. A superrat in rat's clothing."
"Of course, personally, I think it'd be tacky to wear diamonds before I'm 40."
Then again, here's my favorite:
"Cross my heart and kiss my elbows!"
Now I want these stuff: (CLICK!)
I loooove you Audrey Hepburn. I looooove you Holly Golightly. And I loooove you Tiffany's. LOL.
...MiSeRiA dOLcE...
I dunno what to feel right now. I've got good news and bad news for all of you.
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I'll be graduating as VALEDICTORIAN. I will also receive Best in English, Journalist of the Year, a Leadership Award (for being COMELEC Chair), and the Highest Achievement Award. Plus, my parents will be one of the pairs for Most Cooperative Parents.
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I'm trying my best to forget about someone. Sure, he may have made me so happy that I hid him under the name of my favorite street food, but... *sigh* I find it so hard now to trust guys. Especially him. I dunno. Ack. Confused.
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Someone's prolly getting drunk right now. To think he promised he won't. Then again, he took back the promise. Geez.
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Still got yearbook stuff to finish.
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Gotta buy nice shoes for my graduation dress. Can't wait! ;)
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My serious conversation with April got me upset. Guys really suck.
Monday, March 21, 2005
...sOmEtHiNg aBoUt yOu...
Do you think you could love somebody your whole life and never know it until something happens and you see it?
-- Win A Date With Tad Hamilton
Some things just never change. Tsk, tsk. :)
Sunday, March 20, 2005
...FaMe??
"Ihang, gusto mo bang mag-artista?"
That was what my Tito in Balungz told me as we arrived.
Me: Huh? Why? *looks sarcastic in disbelief*
Tito Tolits: May kilala kasi akong talent scout ng ABS. Naghahanap ng bagong talent!
Me: Uhhh... Ayoko! Mas gusto kong mag-model!
Tito Tolits: Sige na, ihang.
My dad: Ayaw niyan, magsu-summa cum laude yan sa UP!
I know, I know. WTF. It was still funny though. Funny how I've grown from the ABS-CCAI workshopper I was three years ago. My workshopmates and I were so eager to apply for VTRs at ABS (I ended up not going because I had to go back to Dagupan) before. We dreamt of being famous. One of my workshopmates, Ralph Hilaga, even wrote in his farewell note, See you at the Oscars.
But now when the opportunity I've looked for three years ago finally came, I can't believe I'm declining. I guess I've matured. I guess I know now what I really want. I want to model, only that.
Perhaps I've realized being famous isn't everything. That I'd rather inspire others than make them envious of me.
Yes, I have grown. I've grown past my cute teenybopper image. Past my kikay stage. I've learned how to shrug off insecurities (and only think about them when I see any girl past 5'4).
Then again, I still have much to learn. I will be 17 in two months and six days, yet I still don't think I'm mature enough. Although for my age, I am.
I don't know what image I'll be another three years from now. I don't know if I'll still rock to OPM. I don't know if I'll still wear flat flip-flops even if I'm only 5'3-point-something. I don't know if I'll still be Chezki da Cowgrrl.
Okay. I dunno how to end this.
I'm just NOT going to accept the offer. LOL. =P
Friday, March 18, 2005
...bOy LuCk cLuB...
Nothing beats having boy buds with different personalities.
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Me: (kidding around) I'm gonna perfect Calculus.
Alv: Haha. Airhead.
Me: You know what, if you were a girl, I'd probably be so mean to you!
Alv: If you were a guy, I'd probably hate you.
Me: That's 'cause you're insecure. Haha.
Alv: If I were a girl, I'd be one of the boys. I'll get close to your boyfriend and you'll be sooo mad at me!
Me: If I were a guy, I'd STEAL your girlfriend. *evil laugh*
Alv: If you were a guy, you'd probably be the nerdiest one in our batch! *evil laugh*
Me: BITCH!
Alv: ASSHOLE!
After having hearty laughs, we shrug it off and continue reviewing for Calculus.
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Don't get me wrong, I love my gal pals to death. But life wouldn't be as crazy, thrilling, exciting, and loud without my boy buds. ;)
Thursday, March 17, 2005
...nOnSeNsE...
After a lifetime (which is equal to four days) without the Internet, I AM BACK! Yay for me! ;)
Just had the first set of our final exams today. I dunno, I don't think I did good in Physics. *bites nails* Even in Filipino because someone stole my notebook yesterday. Arrr. I can't understand why people hafta steal when they can just borrow it!!? Ack. It's the second time my Filipino notebook got stolen. LOL. Anyways.
Last three exams tomorrow. Filipino and Computer projects due tomorrow. Final submission of requirements on Monday. Then we'll know if I'll be preparing my speech or not. LOL.
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Anyway.
I figured this was going to be our last exams. Sniffsniff. I am going to miss my batchmates. The trippings, the jammings, the gimmicks, the parties. Yes, even the petty fights and misunderstandings I just can't help laughing at now.
FOR REAL. I will miss those people.
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I want a Tagalog blog.
Once I get my domain, my Blogger account will be transformed into a Tagalog blog. Darn it, I'm excited. ;)
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This is me. THE REAL ME. Yeah yeah, more than the eyes and the hair and the color alright. The ATTITUDE, get it? ;)
Which Disney Princess are you?
Saturday, March 12, 2005
...bUdDy bLuEs...
Your Brain is 46.67% Female, 53.33% Male |
Your brain is a healthy mix of male and female You are both sensitive and savvy Rational and reasonable, you tend to keep level headed But you also tend to wear your heart on your sleeve |
Alright. That explains why I find guys better buddies. But still, boys are better off as buddies. No romantical involvement at all from now on. ;)
I swear.
Friday, March 11, 2005
...En eStReLLaS...
"Are people's names really written on stars? Can one be ever so blessed with such talent?...
She had already pictured it--the spotlight set on her as she stood there in her beautiful gown. She would be singing her heart out to the applauding audience. Milliions will love her for her talent. Her name would be in lights: YSABELLE, a star that would outshine them all...."
The play still turned out to be a success despite some technical errors and unacted scenes. In fact, our directress rated it a 9, 10 as the highest, with the missed point for the technical problems that caused a bit of dragginess, and even the repetition of an entire act.
Prince added such oomph in his New York, New York song number as he sang and danced in a white boa. I was able to sing A Moment Like This (Kelly Clarkson) well. (Yay for that! I only practiced the song the night before!)
Okay, so here's the story:
Ysabelle Marquez's parents separated and her mom wanted to take her and Ysabelle's sister Lucia to New York. Since Ysabelle had always dreamed of becoming a big star, she was really excited to make it big in New York.
In her high school in New York, her friends and her teacher Mr. Simmons discover her talent. And since every year, their school sends two students to the school of performing arts, Mr. Simmons chooses her. Lucia gets green with envy, of course.
In art school, the competition is reaaally tough. Mrs. Philips, their school head, told her she might as well leave since she seemed to be good at nothing else but singing. Mrs. Philips even said they needed someone naturally gorgeous, and that Ysabelle was drop-dead not gorgeous. Bonnie and her gang always picked on her. Jessica Alberts, the other good singer, pushed her around. She only had Michael to count on. And worse, on a visit to Ysabelle's art school, Lucia was discovered and she joined Ysabelle. Everybody just seemed to be against her.
For years, Ysabelle auditioned. And got rejected because of her looks. But there was one time when Mr. Simmons himself was a judge and he recognized Ysabelle as the other judges told her to leave. He made the judges think twice about rejecting Ysabelle, and soon Ysabelle landed herself a contract.
Meanwhile, as Ysabelle rose, Lucia was again getting jealous even if she was a star herself already. Worse, Jessica Alberts, because of her insecurity told Lucia that Ysabelle was challenging her sister. And so Lucia told Ysabelle they would have a showdown, and that Lucia would beat her.
During the showdown, Lucia's voice cracks during the finale. Backstage, she blames Ysabelle for doing it on purpose while completely oblivious to the fact that Ysabelle's already suffering from a heart attack. Michael walks in just as Ysabelle loses her life.
Lucia makes the final bow for Ysabelle in the ending, while friends Ysabelle has met along the way each hold small candles, including Michael. Lucia and Michael sing the first few lines of One Sweet Day as friends enter during the chorus of the song.
***
OMG. Our play was our batch's LAST production. Thinking of it makes me teary-eyed and all. I'm going to miss my batchmates. Each and every one of them. :(
Wednesday, March 09, 2005
...fOuNdAtiOn wEeK I...
For some reason, I will be playing the lead role in our play this Friday. And guess when I found out? Haha, yeah. Practically some 10 hours ago. From bitchy Jessica Alberts I became the ever-innocent Ysabelle Marquez. And I only found out after our motorcade for the Foundation Week this morning.
I am so stressed out. My mind and body can't function well anymore. HELL, I even hafta memorize Ysabelle's songs and lines! ARGH!
Here are some pics from the motorcade earlier, btw. :)
*Twenty-five years of excellence...?
*My Crew, the Commission on Elections
*Our batch's candidates for Mr. and Ms. Mother Goose: Alvin, Miaka, Cathy, and Koko.
*The Sports Club with their muse, Lynne.
*Alkaidz holding on for dear life at the CAT-McDo pickup van.
*In a photographic mood, as always.
*Freshmen from I-Galileo loving the wind on their hair.
*My Crew, the Commission on Elections
*Our batch's candidates for Mr. and Ms. Mother Goose: Alvin, Miaka, Cathy, and Koko.
*The Sports Club with their muse, Lynne.
*Alkaidz holding on for dear life at the CAT-McDo pickup van.
*In a photographic mood, as always.
*Freshmen from I-Galileo loving the wind on their hair.
Friday, March 04, 2005
...HiP tO bE hEpBuRn...
Yesterday, I had my creative shots for the yearbook. All Seniors were required to have theirs taken since our batch will be having a magazine-themed yearbook.
I was Audrey Hepburn for a day.
I never wanted something else for my creative shot. I was determined to be Audrey. I had to have the perfect outfit (even if it meant re-wearing what I wore to Ate Joe's debut four days ago), I had to look for someone who'd lend me the perfect pair of black gloves, and I had to have those big pearl necklaces. Worse, I had to have a pro do my hair and makeup. But it was all worth it. I was Audrey Hepburn, Audrey Hepburn was me.
The shoot went pretty well. I had Alv taking my pics while Francis Lim, the real photographer, was prepping up for my studio shots. (Okay, the pics are rather blurry, but Alv captured me pretty well. LOL. Thanks, dood.)
*Okaaay. Candid shot. With matching pout.
*Dagupan's photography giant Francis Lim meets Dagupan's Sassy Girl Chesca Sumilang.
*Audrey Hepburn goes Oriental.
*Bite the shades, honey, bite the shades.
Can't wait for the yearbook to come out! ;)
