Wednesday, November 08, 2006
Of last sem and bouncing back.
Before the second sem starts, let me just look back on the one that just ended. I would have to say it was one helluva sem--killer Stat with Dr. S, 10-page stories for Malikhaing Pagsusulat 10, my 17-page Lingkod Aral paper for 108 which I crammed for in approximately 18 hours (8 of which I wasted on just chatting on YM or surfing the Net waiting for inspiration), that group video report I filmed and edited in just one day (Glad Clauds was there to conceptualize the video and to research), and of course, the worthless emotional shitload I had to deal with come mid-sem.
Last sem, I lost a great deal of focus. And so I reap the bitter fruits--mediocre and rather dissatisfying grades. I know I could have done a lot better and it's a shame that I was only able to pick myself up when the semester was nearing its end. But even if I feel bad about most of my grades, it's such a relief I still made it to CS.
Now that I'm finally free of distractions, I pose a challenge to myself--a challenge to not just do better but to do the best; a challenge to not just get by but to excel; a challenge to not just perform but to take each performance to the next level.
But looking back, despite the many distractions, I've learned to appreciate the people who were always there to help me get back on my feet. They were there to comfort me and cheer me up as I endlessly rant about my problems.
I greatly thank Khwekhkhwekh for helping me get over the bitterness by being extremely sweet as they were always there to give hugs and to simply listen to me. I thank you guys a lot for the sympathy that I never thought I'd ever get from other people. And I will never forget how Mico would make me feel a lot better by telling me to just enjoy each moment, how Meg and Marielle would always tell me "I love you!" and for never wishing me anything but the best, how Clauds would always throw witty remarks while being awfully sweet and convincing, how Karen would sacrifice keeping things always nice because she feels for me, how Leann would write me an encouraging note in the middle of 108 to cheer me up, how Mindy would throw me YM hugs, how Mia would send sweet long text messages even if she doesn't really text a lot, how Joy would start plotting evil plans even before I thought about them, and how Shobe would animatedly remark at all the stuff I share to make me feel I was right. It was love, I tell you--you guys really are love. Here's to more bomb threats and macho dancing!
I'm also very grateful for having Rhea to listen and giggle and rant along with me whenever I'd update her. I'll never forget our Starbucks date last sem wherein we spilled our thoughts on a table napkin, which I keep until now. And how could I forget my shock absorber Ate Faith who was the first to see me really explode. And though we never got to talk about my problems, I am also very thankful for Edison who would always tell me to cheer up, who always saw me beyond the surface, who believed in me.
I am thankful for having my parents for giving me another chance of getting my life back. They never gave up on me and they wished and gave me nothing but the best. My promise of a better sem definitely goes to you, Ma and Pa.
There still a lot of people I owe my thanks to. To my friends who've made efforts to post anything online to comfort because there was no other way, to my high school friends who even despite the big shock still managed to send at least a message to cheer me up, to those who taught me a broken heart is not reason enough to get the best that I deserve, to Dana's group who managed to lift my spirits by making me feel better about myself, to Han my childhood friend who always makes me feel good just by talking to her, to those who patiently dealt with my rants--you all deserve a big hug.
Thank you all for helping me get through the toughest semester in my life so far. Thank you for showing me that my own fulfillment should not come from one single person, that my own fulfillment can only come to be when I've regained my self-esteem and -worth.
I now realize just how I am just by having wonderful friends and family to share my burdens with. And now that I know this, I can finally go back to living the charmed life as I face the next sem.
Cheers!
